Showing posts with label funny. Show all posts
Showing posts with label funny. Show all posts

Thursday, March 5, 2009

Mouth is engaged, lips are moving,

I know we have all been doing something like driving down the road and seen a couple talking or yelling at each other, or driving by a house and see the same thing, I am not one who can read lips but I can tell you when their in deep discussion. I see their mouths engaged and lips moving but can't hear the blah blah blah cause the windows rolled up.


I can always tell when someone is talking about me. There's an old saying when someone is talking about you, your ears will be burning. But are they really talking about me, or is it a guilty conscience, or what? Hey over there, I can feel your lips moving but I can't hear your blah, blah, blah.

Its like again, cruising down the road and you're in a hurry and the car in front of you is either slow or won't move at a the damn stop sign/traffic light, arrrrrrr, that chaps my butt. Then you curse their sorry butts and your wife is setting there, saying that's enough of that, or that wasn't necessary. Hey you in the passenger seat, I see your is mouth engaged and your lips moving but all I hear is blah, blah, blah. Do you wanna drive this beast?

Then again driving down the road, and there are some kids with their hats turned backwards and the buttocks of their pants is dragging the ground, is it that they think their cute showing their assets, humm, and your window is rolled up, and they throw you the bird and mouth off something foul, and you raise your hand saying, "what, what, hey you, I see your finger but I can't hear your blah blah blah.

It's like having a cell phone, and calling home on speaker phone and your wife answers, and the first thing she says is, what you doing? (working duh), or you stop with the friends for a beer and she ask, where are you? (drinking duh). You should of been home an hour ago. And your friends hear it, so to save face, you tell her, I hear blah blah blah and I can even hear your lips flappin'.



Its like having a road rage attitude, and your about to pass a car and it seems their stareing at you, and you blurt out an obscenity at them, then you look into the rear view mirror and see brakes lights, and first reaction is, oh shit, disengage mouth, shut lips and drive like hell to get away.

The best way to avoid all the blah blah blah, is not to say anothing at all.

Thanks again jesseb's anything goes.

Shalom and Peace to Isreal

Sunday, March 1, 2009

Wanna get away, (to some beach)

As I sit here looking at a picture of the earth, it amazes me just how big it is and I had never realized it. I have been wanting to write this blog for a while and I think it'll come around now. The thought of a few Airline commercials crossed my mind. Wanna get away, a commercial for Southwest Airlines, where some one does comical and embarrassing things. I think we all have been there at one point in our lives to want to just bury your head, or hide so far back in a closet, anywhere where no one can find us. Yeah wanna get somewhere, Southwest can take ya there, probably one way if ya want, lol.

Then as I was thinking about this blog a couple of song's came to mind. George Strait's song, On the Seashore's of old Mexico, and how he's sitting there as a young man, looking out over the beautiful blue ocean and miles and miles of white sand beaches, all seemed well for the young man but it didn't start out that way. He found himself running from a jail sentence, isn't it strange that when someone wants to escape the law they either head toward Mexico or Canada. He says the first night in Juarez he lost all the money he had when some bad senorita who took advantage of an innocent lad, lol. Now that's something that I wouldn't even have to go to Mexico to happen to me, heck instead of, do you wanna get away, it would be I can't afford to get away.
I can see thousands and thousands of miles of water that encircle this mighty planet. Anywhere you want to go to deep sea fish you can, if you wanted to just go boating, no problem, plenty of room. But as the slogan of Southwest airlines says, "wanna get away, they have room to fly".

Sometimes you just got to get away, how bout a beach somewhere, when life becomes a bitch. What better thing to do than fly away. Like Blake Shelton's song, "Some Beach Somewhere". Pretty cool video and song. The first part of the song, "drivin' down the interstate, runnin' thirty minutes late, singin' Margaritaville and minding my own, some foreign car drivin' through with a road rage attitude, he started yellin' at me like I did somethin' wrong, he flipped me the bird and then he was gone". This song could be a poster song for a road rage class-wanna get away.


Then there's the part about sitting in a waiting room and this has happened to me so many times, yeah, Doctor's office and dentist office. DANG this song is so true. Well I sat in that waitin' room, it seemed like all afternoon, the nurse finally said, doc's ready for you. It never fails as I've sat there and made even the foulest mouth sailor proud, they finally call, and then you look around and notice that most of the people there heard everything you said, yep some beach. I need to get away get away, yep sure do. I know this has happened to thousands of people and some have even died from it which ain't funny but still happens. "I circled the parking lot, tryin' to find a spot, just big enough I could park my old truck. A man with a big cigar, was gettin' into his car, I stopped and I waited for him to back up, but from out of nowhere a Mercedes Benz came cruisin' up and whipped right in, some beach somewhere".

I know this has happened to hundreds of people, then maybe some it has never happened to, not any part of the song. I have done something and said something, which made me at times want to get away. But I have to admit that sometimes, at times, I go over board. I've driven down the interstate running last and have thrown the bird numerous times, had the favor returned but I can't understand why. Just this week I went to the doctor twice to be exact, and it seemed like all afternoon and yes, I swore and swore, then the next day or night seemed for ever and you guessed again I swore and swore and swore some more, (some beach right here).


And the most aggravating is going to a Wal-mart or Grocery store and finding a parking spot then you spot one and before you can get into it, someone in a smaller car whips in, oh some beach. It's enough to just make ya wanna cuss. Now as I was looking again at the picture of the planet earth, again I still see miles and miles of beach and white sand. Nothing has changed on the picture since I started writing, only thing that has changed is the minutes and hours this took to write, lol. I need a beach somewhere.

Writing this brought back a movie we were watching the other night, "The Shawshank Redemption", with Tim Robbins as Andy and Morgan Freeman as Ellis Boyd "Red" Redding. Wonderful movie, I watch it every time it's on. But, as many times as I have watched it, I never saw the beach scene before, wow, some beach, right there. The picture to the left is that same beach at sunset, that Andy and Red hugged each other on still looks as beautiful at sunset.

People, we do so many things in life that are funny to us and embarrassing to others and vise versa like having egg thrown in your face when a joke goes wrong. Just like the Southwest airline slogan says "just makes ya ( wanna get a way)" to some beach somewhere. It is so funny how Singers can write a song like this one lol, just think what the airline might have looked like back then, in the picture below. If the world could hear this song we'd have less road rage and more laughter in the world, But that's my opinion for sure.



Well happy traveling today and everyday, from the desk of jesseb's anything goes

When your days at times make you wanna get away, may you find, some beach somewhere.



Shalom and Peace to Israel.